Are you one member of a couple in New York City struggling through the ups and downs of a complex human relationship in a broken and chaotic world?
What’s that you say?
I just described almost everyone in New York who isn’t single?
Well, I’m not surprised that you say that because we all know what the deal is here.
This city is not built with healthy, stable relationships or even mental health in mind.
Fortunately, though, you don’t necessarily have to push through it all alone, and couples therapy in NYC, like CBT , can benefit you and your relationship in a lot of ways.
After all, one of the only things potentially more challenging than being an average person in this very not average place is being two such people attempting to make a go of it together.
Sometimes it helps to have help.
And with that in mind, we’ll begin this little exploration with…
1. Handle The Outside World Better You’re in NYC, we’re in NYC.
We’re all here in NYC together.
So, let’s be real, this place has a way of getting to even the most psychologically resilient and determined among us.
Unless you have Antisocial Personality Disorder or something, you’re probably feeling the pressure.
Oh, and by the way, if you’re now worrying whether or not you have ASPD, the fact that you’re worrying about it means you probably don’t.
But yeah, life in the Big Apple is not easy or simple .
Almost nobody here feels like they have enough money, are secure in their job, or that they have the number or depth of connections with other humans as they’d like.
That’s the sort of thing that couples therapy in NYC is designed to address.
If you’re feeling anything like what we just described, it’s likely that your partner has been feeling it too.
It has also probably been affecting the relationship between you in both ways that you’ve noticed and others you haven’t.
It’s well known that financial concerns are one of the leading causes of marital breakups (that means divorce) , and that’s not even considering all the other external stressors that the outside world pushes onto both of you every day.
From chronic sleep loss to unforeseen medical issues, it feels like there’s always something going wrong.
It’s totally reasonable to feel overwhelmed and overstressed.
And couples therapy in NYC can be a source of support and tools to help you both navigate this seemingly never-ending hurricane of nonsense together.
That way, you’ll also both be more able to comfort and support each other, which is kind of the whole point of being in a relationship.
2. Deepen Your Emotional Connection With Each Other When you’re stressed out, worn out, and burnt out, expending yet more mental energy to empathize and relate to your partner can be quite a challenge.
But you’ve got to do it!
The thing is that most people don’t necessarily go about it in the healthiest or most productive of ways.
For example, it’s currently trendy on social media to say that making an effort to care or be concerned with your partner’s hardships constitutes “emotional labor” and should be financially compensated or something.
Suffice it to say that, if you have this kind of mentality, you should not expect to ever be in a healthy relationship or remain in one for very long.
But what’s a healthy way then?
Well, imagine that your partner is actually a source of comfort and support because, unless there’s something very wrong, that’s what they are.
Now, imagine that exploring not only your own concerns but also theirs is a soothing and uplifting activity.
Just try to envision how much of a relief it would be at so many times in your life if both you and your partner were not only not afraid to share your genuine concerns with each other, but that you both actually felt more relaxed and cared for afterward.
That’s one of the things that couples therapy in NYC can hopefully help you experience.
3. Resolve The Unresolved Look, we’re all a little bit traumatized.
Some have it worse than others, but we’ve all got issues.
There isn’t a single person in this world, and certainly not in this city, who is just floating above all the rest of us and gliding effortlessly through life with absolutely no concerns of any kind at all.
And if such a person exists, they’re probably doing multiple consecutive life sentences in prison because having absolutely no care for anyone or anything else is not how you stay out of prison.
So, you and your partner both likely have some unresolved issues that are causing strain in your relationship .
That’s normal.
In fact, pretty much everyone in a relationship is going to experience that to some degree because we’re all scared and confused beings fumbling through this life.
But some of these issues can cause more trouble than others, and some of them might be issues that neither you nor your partner even realizes that you have.
A good therapist can help you both explore those aspects of your psyche together so that you both understand how to care for and support each other in the way you need.
Humans Hate Being Alone One of the biggest ironies of living in New York City is that most of us live here because we enjoy the idea of being at the center of the action and being around lots of other people,… but then we don’t socialize.
We go to all this effort to position ourselves amidst all the humanity and events of the day, only to then avoid all of them as much as we can.
We want to belong, contribute, be valued, be respected, and feel that we are part of something bigger than just our individual selves.
However, we so often fail to see that being a valued and respected part of something bigger than ourselves doesn’t have to mean becoming a senator or working for a bank; it can both start and end with the person right beside you.
